Smile.

*Sigh*  The one thing that makes me feel alive is photography. When it's me, my camera and my music playing in the background, the world feels right. Even if it's for the half second the shutter closes and reopens, in that moment, everything seems to make perfect sense. I see the world through a lens, there is no doubt about that, and perhaps that is my problem. I carry my camera with me almost everywhere I go, even if it's to the store for milk...But I haven't turned it on or taken a picture with meaning for almost 6 months.

Why is it so easy to push aside the things that you love so much, including ourselves .I see this happen so much in life with so many people, especially in myself. It is so easy to get caught up in making money, working, running errands, getting things done within a deadline that we forget to take 2 mins to take a picture, give a hug, or simply smile to the person sitting next to us on the bus?? 

I'm making a pledge to myself today...I'm going to smile more, not get irritated with grumpy people, but give them love, pick my camera back up and take more pictures, and most importantly, enjoy life. It's the only one we have...and we never know when it's our time to go. <3 

Inspirational Show

www.framedshow.com

This is an amazingly inspirational show! I'm so excited to watch it every week.

With Fix You on repeat, my heart is sad today...

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference

I honestly don't even really know where to begin with this...

It's been way to long since I've blogged last. The holidays were crazy fun and filled with lots of joy and love, which I'm truly grateful for! More upbeat and happy blogs to come with pictures and laughs from the holiday season, but for right now I need to vent and emotionally throw up, so thank God for blogs.

Love is the greatest thing on earth. I've told him that from day one. I wanted so badly for him to find someone to love and be loved by, so I should be happy for him right? Wrong. I believe that we were put here on this earth to love one another... and  I wish more then anything that I could rejoice for him. I wish that I could share his butterflies and excitement about being in love...but I can't.  I'm angry and disgusted. If the circumstances were different, I could do all of these things with him and for him, but they aren't,they are far from acceptable. The world we live in already has so much sadness and disgust in it and I never, in my wildest dreams, thought he would be another person to add to pain in which the world is suffering. I tried to be the supportive best friend, I tried to understand and not judge, I tried to be happy for him, but I can't do it anymore. My own moral compass is spinning out of control trying to do these things for him, and for my own self, I can't risk loosing myself and my morals trying to hold on to him.

As I'm sitting here listening to Fix You, by Coldplay, I realize that it's out of my control. I wish I could swoop in and slap some sense into him and make him realize that in the end he is only going to get hurt and in the process he is hurting a lot of people around him, but I guess I'm not God, and I can't do that. All I can do from here is pray and keep on loving him.

*Big Sigh*

This feeling inside of my solidifies my belief that I was put on the planet to find good and bring it into view of others. I will find a way to do this, most likely through a picture. <3